Captain Bahadi hesitantly enters the town hall. The Col. is at his desk on the stage poring over maps with Miles. It is obvious from the Captain's body language that he is the bearer of not-so-great tidings.

He stands silent for a few seconds before the stage. The Col. eventually looks up and greets him with a smile.

Bahdi! What good newS do you bring me? How much are the Americans willing to pay for their tourists?

The Captain is frozen with fear.

Speak up, Man. What's wrong!?

Nothing, Colonel. They would give us nothing! They do not believe we have them.

What!!!

Did you give them their passports?

Yes, Sir. They claimed they were forgeries. No one has any record of the Weirdings being in Somali so they accused of us lying.

Did they not communicate with the authorities in Kenya!?

As far as Kenyan officials are concerned the Weirdings are still on safari. They advised the Marines that we are just trying to steal supplies.

Damn the Kenyans!!!

Great! What do we do with them now?

They have accused me of being a liar!

We really cut into our supplies for that little feast we threw the other night and no return on our investment.

Colonel Mohammed Siad Aidid! Lord of the Aidid clan, protector of Bamadu! How dare they!

Plus we got Jarre gettin' ready to hit us from the south and Wahadi from the east. We need the extra equipment Colonel.

The Colonel slumps into his chair and puts his head in his hands.

I knew these Weirdings were bad luck.

EXT. OUTSIDE THE TOWN HALL - NOON

A table has been set with a more modest feast then the night before. Everyone at the table seems in high spirits except the Colonel and Miles who both poke at their food silently.

Jack and Elizabeth are obviously very sore and when no one is watching, they try to sneak a stretch of their aching muscles. The Weirdings seem very satisfied with themselves.

So Colonel. We got the entire field at the end of the village plowed and seeded yesterday. Dunar says in a week we'll see green.

I did not know you were such a farmer.

I'm not. I'm a computer programmer, but it was fun.

It's not as fun as Nintendo, but it was something different.

Your women showed me how to bake bread from the ground up.

Elizabeth takes a bite from some bread.

Isn't it delicious, Colonel.

The Colonel. gives her a wan smile. DUNAR sits next to Jack. Dunar addresses the Colonel who responds with a curt, snippety response. Dunar looks slighted.

What did he say.

He says it is ironic that the white men bring back the old ways and that I can only bring food in boxes and guns... I pointed out to him I am keeping him alive.

Maybe with the Marines in Somalia you'll be able to return to the old ways.

Unless the Marines know how to change men's hearts, I doubt it.

Dunar speaks to the Colonel again in Somali. He stands up enraged and screams at Dunar in Somali. In a huff he sits back down. Dunar talks back to him and gets up and leaves.

What did he say?

He says maybe you can stay here for a while. You bring good luck with you. He says Allah walks with you.

What did you say, Colonel?

I told him he was an old fool. I told him to survive in Somali a farmer needs to be a better shot than a cultivator. I told him to stop living in the past if he wants to survive.

And he said?

That is no way to talk to your father.

That's your father?

Foolish old man...

Is that part of your family values? To be disrespectful to your father?

He knows not the way of the world! If we were to return to the fields Jarre would raid this village and cast us all in chains. And those who resisted would be slaughtered.

The Colonel's right about that. Colonel Jarre's a mean bastard.

Sounds like the pot calling the kettle... Never mind.

The table becomes silent. The diners eat in silence for a few seconds.

Do you have news of our release yet?

The Colonel pokes at his food. He is obviously very angry.

Evidently your fellow Americans don't think highly enough of you to pay for your return.

The Weirdings take this news like a body blow.

What!

What!

The Marines in Mogidishu don't really believe we have you. Since you were snatched from Kenya, no one in this country knows you're here.

Didn't they contact anyone in Kenya?

The fools still think you are on safari.

Well, what are you going to do now, Colonel?
(hopefully)

Fly us back?

The pilot who flew you here will not be returning for another two weeks. Even then I don't know if I can afford to fly you out. He is very expensive.

Well, why doesn't one of your men just take us to Mogidishu to the Marines?

That would have been possible a week ago, but now the various clans are fleeing Mogadishu and the countryside has become very dangerous. In addition we have reports that Col. Jarre has every intention of attacking us from the south.

Bastard.

Well, why don't you just give us one of your Jeeps, and we'll drive back to Kenya?

One of my technicals! Lady, I would sooner give away my left arm.

Well, you're the one that brought us here! You said you would return us! Does the Colonel always break his word so easily!?

Elizabeth.

I have no choice in what I do!! It is your Marines that caused this. Had they paid you'd be on your way by now.

You didn't have to kidnap us in the first place.

The Col. stands and slams the table.

But I did and here you are and you are still my prisoners!

Susie starts crying.

I want to go home.

Not guests anymore!

Elizabeth gathers her daughter to her to console her. Johnny looks at his little sister crying and then turns to the Colonel

You're real tough aren't you! It takes a real man to make a little girl cry. I bet my family could kick your ass without all your guns.

Johnny.

Careful, Son. You don't want to be challengin' the Colonel.

Oh really, little white boy. Big words for a little man.

What's the matter? You scared to take my bet?

And what do you have to bargain with little man?

Johnny, hush.

Your family fights my family. If we win you let us go free. If we lose we'll be your slaves.

Elizabeth and Jack look at Johnny like he is out of his mind. He looks back at them with a knowing smile.

Mom, Dad, we can do it!

You're going to get us all killed!

Miles gets up and pulls the Colonel to the side.

Look, it might not be such a bad idea. We can get some good work out of them, and maybe bein' slaves we'll make 'em more cooperative until we can straighten out this mess with the Marines. Besides, you don't have to feed slaves quite as much.

The Colonel nods in agreement, and they return to the table.

Very good then. It is your family against mine. No guns. If my family wins, you will be my willing and cooperative slaves. If your family wins, you go free.

Shit.

Miles! You will fight Jack.

Miles smiles at Jack.

Ali!

Ali is at the other end of the table and stands. The Colonel spits off some Somali to him and he looks at Johnny and smiles.

Captain Bahadi will fight the lady.

Colonel, I would rather--

That is an order, Captain!

Yes, Sir.

The Colonel looks at Susie and his heart melts a little. He looks around the table until his eyes come to rest on a dirty old man at the end of the table.

He barks out some orders at the old man who smiles luridly at Susie. Elizabeth hugs her tighter.

Said will fight the little girl.

Even Susie has to fight?

My family against yours, American? That is the bet. Tomorrow morning we will have our fun.

The Colonel claps his hand and the table breaks up with a chorus of hoots and hollers.

EXT. IN FRONT OF THE TOWN HALL - MORNING THE NEXT DAY

The Colonel sits on a chair overlooking the circle of villagers surrounding the Weirdings.

It is obvious that the mood of the villagers is mixed. The soldiers are excited about the entertainment while the women and elders are concerned for the Weirdings. Each of the Weirdings' opponents is lined up in front of them.

The fight is over when all four opponents are down. You may yield if you wish, but if one Weirding loses, then you all lose.

Hey! That's not fair!

Neither is life, young Weirding. I have told you that before.

It doesn't matter. We're going to kick your ass.

Miles smiles at Jack like he's about to eat lunch. With a flash a four inch boot knife appears in his hand.

What happened to no weapons?

That was no guns, Jack. Knives is fine. Looks like you forgot yours.

More like someone stole it.

Don't worry, Jack. I ain't gonna kill you. I just want to give you a nice scar to remember me by.

Elizabeth is in a ready stance opposite a reluctant Captain Bahdi. She keeps looking over at her daughter.

I am truly sorry about this, Lady. I will try to be gentle.

Me too, Captain.

Johnny and Ali are having an intense and silent stare down.

Susie has put her thumb in her mouth and looks like the picture of innocence. Said is the picture of the dirty old man. He looks like he is about to have the time of his life.

Ready!

The Colonel withdraws his sidearm and fires a shot into the air.

Miles slashes out at Jack who desperately dodges the strike.

Captain Bahdi rushes to tackle Elizabeth. She merely steps out of the way at the last second and he goes barreling into the crowd.

Ali throws two jabs into a startled Johnny's face and bloodies Johnny's nose.

Susie just stares at Said with her best little girl look. Said starts to slowly move toward her.

Miles gets a slash in and puts a small gash in Jack's lead shoulder.

Elizabeth watches expectantly as Said moves on Susie.

Captain Bahdi is pushed back into the ring and slams an unwary Elizabeth into the ground. Elizabeth rolls free of him in a cloud of dust.

Johnny blocks another jab to the face, but takes an upper cut to the stomach. He folds up and falls to the ground while a smiling Ali stands over him.

Said grabs Susie by both shoulders and lifts her up into the air opposite him. Susie's thumb is still in her mouth. With a scream she sticks two fingers, Three Stooges style, into Said's eyes.

He drops her with a scream of pain. Susie adopts a fighter's stance and scoots in with a front kick to his groin. Said folds up. Susie turns her back to Said, wraps her arms around his neck, and flips him over her shoulder.

Said crashs to the ground with a dull thud. Susie drops her elbow into the center of his forehead and he goes out. The Colonel is shocked.

Miles snickers at the pain he has inflicted on Jack and lunges in with a thrust toward Jack's face. Jack blocks to the inside of Miles' knife arm. He spins into Miles' midsection with an elbow to the solar plexus. Miles folds

Jack drops an elbow to the back of Miles' elbow. Miles screams in pain and drops the knife. Jack stands Miles back up. Jack kicks Miles in the face. Miles is dazed.

Jack uses Miles' arm as a bar and flips him onto the ground. He finishes Miles off with the an elbow strike.

Elizabeth comes up opposite Captain Bahadi in a fighter's stance. The Captain moves in on her.

Elizabeth slides in with a sidekick to the midsection and a scream. The Captain doubles over and she comes down with an elbow strike to the back of his head. The Captain is out before he hits the ground.

Johnny is on the ground clutching his stomach. Ali steps in to drop kick him in the head. Johnny moves to the side at the last second and lets the kick sweep by his head.

Johnny stands with the kick grabbing Ali's foot at the apex. Johnny steps in behind Ali's supporting leg and sweeps it out from underneath him. Ali is slammed into the ground and Johnny drops a knee into his groin.

Ali doubles up towards Johnny in pain and Johnny finishes Ali off with a palm heel into Ali's nose.

Johnny stands up, flushed with adrenaline and looks at the Colonel

And that, Colonel, is the Weirding way!

The entire village is silent. Some of the elders and village women are smiling. The Colonel is in shock.

You are not Americans!!! You are demons! White demons! Agents of destruction sent to destroy me!

You made a bet! Now keep your side of the bargain!

Lady, I am pleased you won! You are making me crazy! Killing me! I want you out of here more than you want to leave.

The Colonel barks some orders at his chagrined men and they run into the town hall.

EXT. AT THE EDGE OF THE VILLAGE

The Weirdings stand at the edge of the village confronted by the Colonel and several of his armed men. The Weirdings are each handed a large canteen of water and a backpack full of food.

You have your freedom, now go! I suggest you head for the south. Kismayu is about a hundred and fifty miles in that direction.

A hundred and fifty miles!

You wanted your freedom, Lady. Now you will understand how hard it is to be free... If you keep a good pace, you can reach Kisamayu in five days. Avoid Afmadu. Jarre has men there.

Jack looks out over the vast dusty plains with a concerned look. Elizabeth shakes her head and clutches her childrens hands. Jack turns back to the Colonel.

If anything happens to any of my family, Colonel.... I'll be back.

The Colonel grins at this threat and then spins on his heel and leaves. His men follow him reluctantly.

When the Colonel isn't looking, one of his men hands Johnny his steel baton with a concerned smile. Johnny returns the smile and puts it in his pocket.

The Weirdings start on their trek. They have only gone a couple hundred yards when one of the technicals comes chasing after them with Captain Bahadi at the wheel.

He stops in a cloud of dust in front of the Weirdings. He exits the vehicle holding a small backpack. He offers it to Jack.

Please, Family do not judge the Colonel too hard. He is under enormous pressure. There are forces that would annihilate us, and he is responsible for our safety.

Jack shrugs his shoulders, obviously unimpressed. Elizabeth looks away, with hate filled eyes.

What's in the bag?

There is a topographical map of the countryside and a good compass. Can you use these?

I'm a star scout. I've got my orienteering merit badge.

Good, Young Weirding. Than you must guide your family safely to Kisamayu. Jack, you must avoid Afmadu and Jarre's men. They truly are animals. I have also given you half of my weekly ration in there. It is for the children.

Elizabeth looks at Bahadi and starts to cry. She wraps her arms around him with a heartfelt hug.

Oh, Bahadi, thank you.

Bahadi smiles and returns the embrace. They part and Bahadi smiles at her.

How could I not honor the Goddess of War? I have never been beaten' so soundly by a man never mind a women.

I'd rather you remembered the hug.

I will, Lady.... There are hats and blankets in the backpack also. Keep your heads covered and do not travel in the heat of the day.

Captain Bahadi returns to his technical and the Weirdings watch him go. With a collective family sigh they head off toward the coast of Somalia.

INT. TOWN HALL - SAME

Miles is stretched out on an army cot, unconscious. A strikingly beautiful village woman tends to his forehead with a damp cloth.

Dunar sits in a rusty metal folding chair against the opposite wall. He sucks on a cigarette and watches Miles intently. The Colonel broods at his desk on the stage.

Finally Miles groans and sits up. He swings his feet to the floor and grabs his head with another moan. He rests his head in his hands and Dunar laughs at him. He shoots some words in Somali at Miles.

I wish it were your liquor that did this, Old Man. I wouldn't feel so bad.

There is a brief silence and then the Col. addresses Miles.

You lost, Miles.

How was I to know he was a bloody Bruce Lee?

The Col. slams the table and stands knocking his chair over backward.

You lost!

Miles looks up at him confused.

So I lost. What're you gettin' on about?

Should I have you thrown out of a plane for this failure? Like my other men?

They weren't from this village. The weren't part of your family.

And that makes a difference. Jarre is about to attack us and you are tossing my men out of planes like they are coke bottles!

Colonel, this ain't about me. It's about the Weirdings, isn't it?

They are demons! How could you lose! You are a soldier, bred and born. He was a computer programmer for the love of Allah!

Must be a tough business.... I haven't been beat that badly since you saved my sorry ass... They didn't all win?

Sorry ass is right. Yes they all won.

Said lost to the little girl?

That little girl nearly blinded him in addition to smashing his fool skull

A disgusted Col. sits back down.

You didn't let 'em go did you?

I had no choice. I gave my word.

Well, bloody hell, Col. We spent a good deal of our supplies on them with nothing to show for it.

I gave my word.

You didn't give them a technical did you?

The Col. looks at him like he's an idiot.

Of course not! I gave them some provisions and sent them on their way

Looking at the Colonel in disbelief.

Well, where did you send them? Whose their guide?

They are headed towards Kismayu.

Bahadi go with them?

The Col. replies with silence.

He sent them out alone.

Miles looks at the old man in disbelief and then at the Col.

You didn't send them out alone!?

I don't have the men to spare.... I'm surprised you care.

It ain't right, Col. Jarre's looking for blood, the whole countryside's infested with the scum of Mogidishu and you sent the Weirdings out alone?

Since when did you care about anyone else other than us?

Miles buries his aching head in his hands again.

Colonel, I'm probably one of the lowest forms of life on the face of the earth. But I got respect for any man that can whip me in a fair fight... And this fight weren't even fair. I had a knife!... They helped our people, Colonel. Helped plant our fields.

We need soldiers not farmers.

It's not right, Colonel. We kidnapped 'em, robbed 'em, beat 'em, Christ we almost raped 'em and they helped plant our fields... Those ain't enemies Colonel... It ain't right, Colonel. They're good people. You send 'em out into the country like that and they're gonna die. Did you even give 'em a map?

Indirectly.... Why is it you weren't so generous with my men on the plane?

They wasn't from this village, just more jackals feeding on the despair of Somalia. They was only here cause a what food we got.

How poetic. As long as they are my jackals I don't care.

It ain't right, Col.

The Col. slams the desk.

What would you have me do! I cannot protect everyone that enters my village. I can barely protect my own people, my own family. I am only one man!

And maybe not even that.

The Col. looks at his father in disbelief, fury gathering behind his eyes.

You talk of family, Mohammed, yet you teach our sons to kill, you teach our daughters how to cry... You talk of Somalia, yet you help to burn her villages. You grow crops of fire and ash, fields of dust where once was green....

That is what war is, Father.

But you talk of family, not war. Is this what you have learned of family? If so, then truly I am a failure.

It is not what you taught me, Father it is the way I am forced to live. The way we are all forced to live. That is called reality.

Reality? Forced to live this way? You brought these Americans to us. Forced them here... They remind us what a family truly is. Love, song, being together, being one. They remind us of these things and you throw them into the country, to the jackals Miles speaks of. Is this how you run our family, my son?

The Col.'s gaze has softened. His father's words have rung true. Dunar stands and looks at his son in silence. After a few seconds of silence he addresses the Col.

Have you fought so long, have you killed so much you have forgotten what a miracle looks like?

What are you talking about, old man?

I told you Allah walks with these Americans.... Come with me.

Dunar leads them out of the town hall.

EXT. THE FIELD AT THE END OF BAMADU.

Dunar leads his son and Miles around the edge of the last building before the field. He makes a broad gesture to the field before them and the Col.'s jaw drops open.

Miles looks in wonder at a field already gone green with tiny sprouts where before was little more than desert.

Dunar smiles.

EXT. TWENTY MILES SOUTH OF BAMADU - LATE AFTERNOON

The Weirdings walk along the hot dusty plains of Somalia. Jack carries an exhausted Susie. They are all wearing hats that are obviously a motley assortment of Salvation Army handouts. They march in silence.

EXT. THIRTY MILES SOUTH OF BAMADU - DUSK

The Weirdings discover a large rock in the broken terrain and make their way toward the monolith. They throw their gear at the base of the rock and collapse at its foot.

Elizabeth fumbles through one of the packs and finds some food for the kids. She hands Jack some rations and starts giggling.

What's so funny?

When we get home we should advertise the Weirdings wonder diet. A combination of exercise and no food will produce the slim trim build you've always desired.

Don't forget the part about fighting a crazed band of Somali gunmen.

Or planting a whole field.

And grinding your own bread.

They all start laughing, mostly from exhaustion. Elizabeth digs through her pack and comes out with a blanket. Jack does the same.

We're going to have to snuggle up real tight tonight to stay warm.

I'm really tired.

What are you tired for, Dad carried you half the way.

Johnny.

We're all tired, Sweetie. Even without a bed I think we'll all sleep well.

Elizabeth spreads one of the blankets on the ground and then the other blanket on top of that. She makes pillows of the knapsacks. The Weirdings all crawl into the makeshift bed.

They share a canteen and the remainder of their food and then snuggle up as a family.

EXT. THIRTY MILES SOUTH OF BAMADU - MORNING

The sun has been up for a couple of hours. The Weirdings are still fast asleep under their rock. Susie wakes up to find a couple of jackals sniffing the air a few yards away from them.

She smiles and the jackal runs off. The Weirdings all begin to stir.

EXT. TWENTY-FIVE MILES SOUTH OF BAMADU - SAME

A technical is stopped on the plains and four, armed Somali men stand in front of it pointing at the ground and conversing in Somali. One gets down on his knees and points at the footprint there.

Nike!

Reebok!

Puma!

L.A. Gear!

Americans!!!!!

Click here for PART V