Displasia, Goddess of Gluttony and Foodstuffs wrapped her corpulent lips around the phallus that jutted from the loins in front of her. She groaned in ecstasy as salty juices squirted into her mouth. She slid a hand to the grapefruit-sized balls near her chin and squeezed until they spurted even more juice. With a sigh of total contentment she leaned back from the table… spent.
"Truly you have outdone yourself, Waybest."
The Goddess's High Chef smiled a somewhat relieved smile and bowed his head, "I've spent a month researching which fruits and meats would blend to the most perfect combination of culinary climax. The sausage is a mixture of bandabeast, rabbit and pork stuffed in fligot intestine. The fruits are rasgens, planups and grapefruits. The sauce is my own special blend and as you can see the entire melange is sculpted to represent your favorite action hero."
Displasia clapped her hands in glee at the food sculpture before her, "It is stupendous. You have truly outdone yourself."
Waybest bowed again, "I serve only to please, most Corpulent One."
Displasia graced her worshipper with a smile and dabbed at some juice running its course through her jowls. For the first time she noticed the Chef's emaciated form, "Why are you so disgustingly thin, Waybest? Are you ill?"
Waybest held back the frown threatening to form on his lips, "You visited the wasting disease upon me, milady, when my last creation displeased you."
The Goddess raised an eyebrow at the memory, "Oh, yes, that spicey cajun thing. I forgot about that. Well, I am a forgiving Goddess and you certainly have redeemed yourself. Go to Bertha of Butt, High Priestess of Demitasse and ask her to give you the potion of healing… or was that the potion of fattening? Whatever, have her give you both."
The chef smiled and cursed himself for preordering the casket, "So it shall be done, Most Wide."
Waybest bowed and left the candlelit room to the Goddess and her Acolytes. Displasia snatched up a fork and knife and began to carve large slices of bandabeast from the food sculpture. She could see some of her most favored and rotund servants drooling at the sight of her significant repast. A bit of gravy slipped off her fork and fell onto the red diaphanous material that covered her gargantuan breasts… she found this stimulating.
Her bloated High Priest Corpus Extremus floated nearby in the shadows. A black leather harness imbued with magics designed to support his massive weight dug into his ample folds of flesh. Under one arm he carried the gold embossed, leather bound, holy cookbook. His beady feral eyes issued a stare that fairly penetrated Displasia's corpulent flesh.
Displasia motioned to the seat at her right hand, "Come and join me Corpus. You're making me nervous staring at me like that."
Corpus smiled broadly and with a magical hum his harness moved him into position. A nearby servant hastily ran to pull the chair from the table so that Corpus could float freely in the spot, "Many thanks Expansive One. I'm afraid my stomach was guiding my eyes."
Displasia grinned as her second tore into the mound of food before them, "Where is Bulbous? He's late."
"My apologies, Most Ponderously Plump, but Bulbous is not known for his punctuality. In some circles he is known as Bulbous the Late."
The Goddess raised an eyebrow, "Is he the right man for the job?"
"Most definitely, Goddess. There is not a shiftier, craftier, more conniving individual within your entire larder."
Displasia snorted and in time to this celestial retort the temple alarms began to ring. The massive iron alloy doors rolled back soundlessly as the gargantuan form of Bulbous the Late strode through the doors. The warrior spy stood over seven feet tall and seemed almost as wide. He fairly rolled through the room while his long brown robe and loose fitting clothing billowed about him. A great war helm in the shape of a wild boar hid his dark, scarred, repulsive features (more than one individual screamed when that helm came off).
Bulbous went to his Goddess's side and knelt down below the table she sat at, "Your servant, Most Continental Corpulence."
Displasia smiled and motioned to the empty seat next to her, "Join us Bulbous while I give you your charge."
Bulbous fairly leapt to the table. He removed his helm (somewhere someone screamed) and placed it on the empty seat next to him. With a flash of steel a razor-sharp knife and needle-point fork were in his greasy hands, "Many thank most Gracious Goddess. I have not eaten this hour."
Her Wideness grinned as the spy ripped into a side of bandabeast like a piranha, "Opportunity presents itself to me within the Pantheon."
Bulbous popped a walnut-sized grape into his mouth, "How so Widest of the Wide?"
"Asshkaan and Balthon are set to come to blows. They've summoned champions and seem to travel on the path to war. This pleases us."
Corpus jabbed a fork at Bulbous from across the table, "But the Capricious bitch conspires to interfere."
A confused Bulbous stared at his Goddess blankly, "How does this war between the Gods effect us, Lady of the Lard?"
"As you know I am despised by the rest of the Pantheon. They're all so wrapped up in their pencil-thin physiques and low percentage body fat. They no longer even invite me to their gatherings. I am ostracized by their thinner-than-thou attitude."
Bulbous scowled, "If they were not Gods, lady, I would knife every one of them in the spine."
Displasia smiled and lovingly patted her spy on the hand, "You are a dear, Bulbous. But there is no need for this action. Long ago I aligned myself with the demon kin, they are our allies in these matters."
An evil grin curled around the rabbit leg jutting from Bulbous' mouth, "Too sweet, Revered Rotund."
"If Asshkaan and Balthon turn to fighting, as I'm sure they will, then the Pantheon will be weak enough for us to move in. The demon kin have promised me ten legions of their Sauronkind terror troops. They will make me governess over all the kingdoms of the Pantheon. I will rule supreme subject only to the High Lord of Demons himself."
Corpus clapped greasy hands, "Most deserved, Goddess! Most deserved!"
Displasia's visage turned evil, she jammed a fork in Bulbous' face and hissed, "Then we'll see about those bloody weight watchers!"
Bulbous leaned closer, "What would you have me do, lady?"
"Find out who Capricious has sent as an agent. Remove him. Then make sure that Asshkaan and Balthon's servants travel the path to war."
Bulbous smiled an evil grin, "It shall be done, lady… with extreme prejudice."
The Goddess smiled at her will to be done. The three returned to their meal as maggots to rotting flesh.