"The Beautiful People"

Screenplay by

A. A. Roberts

Copyright A. A. Roberts 1992 
All Rights Reserved
Registered  WGA/W

(860) 429-7862
9 Lakeside Dr.
Ashford, CT 06278


DOLPH NEWHAUSE is behind the wheel of a beat up Dodge four by four. 
Dolph is a very large, athletic individual of Nordic descent.  His normally 
piercing blue eyes are dulled by the effects of a long day and a long drive.

The engine dies.  Dolph pulls off to the side of the road next to a grassy field.  

Dolph exits the truck like the weight of the world is on his shoulders.  He 
opens the hood.   He pokes about the engine.  

The light under the hood flickers and goes out.  He pulls his head out from 
under the hood and bangs his head.  He slams the side of the truck.

          Piece of shit!
There is a silent flash behind Dolph.  He spins to find the source of light.  

In the middle of a grassy field behind him there is a bright light that 
dances in place.  Tendrils of energy seem to stream off of this ball of force.  

Intrigued like the proverbial moth, Dolph sets out across the field.


Dolph stops a few yards away from the light.  He stares in amazement 
at this display of ethereal forces.  

The light bridges the distance to Dolph instantaneously.  He is in the light. 
He totters, balanced on the edge of a precipice contained within this 

He falls with a scream.


Dolph screams as he falls head over heels into the light.  Eternity 
stretches before him.


Still screaming, Dolph materializes six feet above the ground.  He slams 
into the ground with a sickening thud and bounces on to his back.  

He GROANS and then passes out.


Three men tower over Dolph.  We can just make out their outlines, but 
their speech is clear to us.

                           VOICE 1
          It is as Adomass said...  He is huge.
                           VOICE 2
          We'll break our backs getting him to 
          the castle.
                           VOICE 1
          We should have brought some 
          damned  peasants to carry him.
                           VOICE 3
          Never mind a little work.  Hoist 
          him up and get him to the pack horse.
Two of the voices GROAN with effort. The world swims around Dolph.  He is 
hoisted to a pack horse.  He is almost dropped.

                           VOICE 3
          Careful, you fools!  Crack his 
          head open and we're lost.
Dolph is secured on the blurred image of a horse.  The horse begins to move.  
The world bobbles up and down as Dolph passes out again.


Dolph is on his back staring into a gray ceiling.  The rough voices of the men 
have been replaced with the refined voices of a woman and two older men.  
Their blurred images hover over him.

                           MAN 1
          It is as you said, Adomass, he 
          is a big one.
          It is not his size that is important. 
          It is his invulnerability.
          I wonder if he is as big all over.
          Lucinda!  Such thoughts are unseemly 
          for a daughter of the King.
          I was only referring to his feet, Father.  
          May I lift the covers and see?
          No, you may not!  Maybe I should 
          have one of the chambermaids look 
          after this one.
          Oh, Father!  Don't be so crotchety!  
          I was only having fun.
          These are dire times, Lucy.  Forgive 
          my lack of humor.
The two men leave in a blurred collage.

          Tend to him well, Lucy.  Our 
          future depends on him.

Dolph's eyes flutter open.  

He is greeted with the sight of a diaphanous silk canopy.  He finds himself in large 
four poster bed in a cavernous bedroom.  The walls are lined with tapestries 
illustrating various mythic battles.  

Directly across from the bed a window with open shutters reveals a beautiful spring day.
LUCINDA MALVALLE fills a basin at a nearby table with warm water from a silver pitcher.  
She doesn't see Dolph appraising her.  

She's a beautiful strawberry blond in her early twenties.  Her ample figure is accented by 
a white, floor length silk gown.

          Excuse me?
Lucy screams and drops the pitcher.  With a flash that would gut a warrior, she produces a 
slim dagger.  

The vicious glare of an animal crosses her face.  A sheepish grin replaces the ugly mask.  
She bounces her weapon up down as though it were a spoon.

          You startled me, Fair Knight.
She tosses the blade next to the basin.  

          Where am I?
   	  (sweet as an angel)
          You are at the castle Malvalle in Varchone.  
          I am Lucinda Malvalle, daughter of 
          Brian Malvalle the king of these fair lands.
          How did I get here?
          The wizard Adomass summoned you.
          I must've really banged my head.
Lucinda snatches up a silk cloth.  She tends to Dolph's forehead.

          Oh you did good sir.  Adomass is 
          very adept at summoning, but not 
          so good at providing for a tender arrival.
          I must be dreaming.
Lucy pulls close to Dolph.  She becomes a sensuous animal.
          Do dreams smell so sweet, Warrior?
Lucinda parts the silk shirt Dolph is wearing.  She runs her hands over his ample 

          Do dreams have such a delicate 
          touch to them, Warrior?
She begins to run her hands down his chest to his nether regions.  Dolph's 
eyes go wide.

          Do dreams offer such pleasant 
          promise, Dear Knight?
Lucy starts to seduce Dolph with the most desirous kisses.

The door to the bedroom bangs open.

                           KING MALVALLE
Lucy snatches her hands back and pulls away from Dolph.

          I was merely greeting our fair guest 
          with a morning kiss, Father.
The King strides to the bed with the crush of anger in his boots.  

The King is of medium build and in his late forties.  He sports a gray beard and 
mustache.  He is dressed in leather garb of the type worn during the 1100s. A 
short sword dangles at the kings side.

ADOMASS, the kings wizard, strolls behind his lord.  He appears to be the same 
age as his king.  He is dressed much the same.

          It would seem the princess is 
          attempting to lay a spell of 
          enslavement on our guest.
	  (sweet as light)
          Nay Adomass.  I only wish to make 
          him feel welcome.
                           KING MALVALLE
          You are randy as a mare in heat, Lucy.
The king grins, turns to Dolph.

                           KING MALVALLE
          So how say you, Warrior?  Are you fit?
                           KING MALVALLE
          I'm an engineer, not a warrior...  
          Well actually a graduate student 
          of electrical engineering.
The King turns questioningly to Adomass.

                           KING MALVALLE
          You were to bring me a warrior, Wizard?  
          What is an ELECTRICAL engineer?

          I assure you he is, My Lord.  From 
          whence he came the standards by 
          which a warrior are made are different.
                           KING MALVALLE
          Ah, I see.  You are an engineer warrior!  
          A maker of catapults, perchance?          
          What's happening to me?  Where am I?  
          Why can't I wake up?
Adomass pulls a long slender needle from his sleeve.  He jabs Dolph in the shoulder.  

Dolph screams, jumps up and clutches his shoulder.  He glares at the wizard.

          As you can see, Warrior, this is no 
          dream.  Pain is real, the ladies are 
          real and death is real.  This world is 
          very different from the one you have 
          come from.  Danger feeds on the unwary.  
          You must come to terms quickly with 
          your situation.  Quickly, if you are to 
Dolph starts to look like a caged animal

          It's not possible! 
          Some of my better magics.  
          Do not mock what you do not 
          understand, Engineer.
                           KING MALVALLE
          This will all be explained to you shortly, 
          Warrior.  The Lady Lucinda will tend to 
          your hurts.  At midday we will explain 
          your situation.  How shall we call you?

          Your name, Dullard.
          Dolph Newhause.
                           KING MALVALLE
          Very good then, Dolph.  As the wizard 
          says, it is important that you gather your 
          wits quickly.  These are dread times.
          Lucy, summon the servants and a healer.  
          Tend to his hurts not his-
The King chuckles.  He leaves with Adomass.

Lucinda and two of her servants escort Dolph into the King's hall.  The windowless 
room is immense.  The only illumination is supplied by firelight.

An ornate carpet leads to the dais where the king sits on his throne.  Adomass 
stands at the King's side.  Warrior knights line either side of the carpet.  

Behind the warriors stand the ladies and gentlemen of the court.  They are 
resplendent in finery.  They are the definition of the beautiful people.

Dolph makes his way through the ranks.  He ignores the cold suspicious stares 
of the warriors.  

Lucy and her servants curtsy when they reach the foot of the stairs.

          Why am I here?
The King shifts in his throne, perturbed.
                           KING MALVALLE
          It is common to kneel to the king 
          when you are presented to him.
          I come from a land where there are 
          no kings and no bowing.  Every man 
          is equal.
The closest warrior whips out his sword.  He puts it to Dolph's throat.  

Dolph turns and stares down at the man impassively. AUGUSTUS is of medium build 
with red hair and a braided beard.

          The king said kneel, Cur!
The King waves off Augustus.

                           KING MALVALLE
          It's all right Augustus.  Put away your 
          sword.  This is no way to treat our new 
          friend.  He is strange to our ways.
Augustus obliges grudgingly.  Malvalle appraises Dolph for a second.

                           KING MALVALLE
          You have come to terms with your 
          surroundings?  You realize this is 
          no dream?
          Since I can't seem to wake from it, 
          I might as well go along with it.
                           KING MALVALLE
          Good!  If that is how you wish to view 
          the matter then so be it.  Just understand 
          to die here is to die the real death.  Do 
          you understand this?
Dolph shrugs his shoulders.

                           KING MALVALLE
          Very well, then. 

Malvalle motions to Adomass.

                           KING MALVALLE
Adomass steps forward to address Dolph and the room.          
          Why are you here?...  I must admit 
          with the greatest humility that it is 
          because of my error.
There are a couple of derisive snorts among the warriors. Adomass shoots them 
cold stares.

          There was a sorcerer named Magnus 
          a hated enemy of this realm.  Time and 
          again he visited his vile creations upon 
          us.  These monstrosities cursed us for 
          twenty years and brought down many a 
          fine warrior.
Several warrior make noises of agreement.

          The King, having the deepest sympathy 
          for the plight of his people, directed me 
          to find a cure for Magnus' vile sorcery.  
          I decided to find one invulnerable to Magnus' 
          magics, but one who could be invested with 
          magics of his own.  A warrior magician 
          outside of this realm.  And so I summoned 
          one called Corwin.
The warriors shift about and curse at the mention of this name.

          I sent him to destroy Magnus, which 
          he did.  But this traitor rose up to take 
          his place and has become much worse 
          then Magnus ever was.
          What's all this got to do with me?
                           KING MALVALLE
          We want you to destroy Corwin and 
          free us from this vile curse.
          Me?  What makes you think I can 
          handle him?
          The world you came from imbues 
          you with the same invulnerability 
          to our magic.  Corwin can fight you 
          only on the physical realm.
                           KING MALVALLE
          You are large, he is small.  You should 
          have no problem with him.
          And if I refuse?
Several warriors grumble menancingly and the King shifts uncomfortably.  Adomass 

          Your efforts will not go unrewarded.  
          you may choose to stay here and be 
          treated as second only to my lord.
          With riches beyond imagining.
Adomass nods at Lucy who blushes.  She curtsies to the Wizard's compliment.

          If this is not enough for you, then 
          we will send you home with as much 
         wealth as you can carry.
                           KING MALVALLE
          Which looks like a fair amount.
          I'm an engineer not a mercenary.
Augustus draws his sword again.  He places the point on Dolph's throat.  Dolph turns and 
stares at him.

          Enough!  I tire of this disrespect to 
          the king, Wizard!
          Remove it.
          It is your vile magic that got us here 
          in the first place, Magician.  Let me 
          quest for Corwin, My Lord.  I can defeat 
          Remove it.
The King slams his throne.

                           KING MALVALLE
          Time and again you have led my men 
          to destruction, Augustus!  Magic must 
          fight magic!  I will not lose any more men 
          to your pride.
          I would have succeeded if the Wizards 
          spells of protection had worked as he 
          I said, remove it.
          Silence, Dog!
Dolph bats the sword away and slams Augustus in the chest with a palm heel.  The 
warrior sails backwards through the air onto the floor.  

In one fluid motion the knight who was standing next to Augustus draws his sword.  
He takes a swipe at Dolph's head.  

Dolph steps back, lets the sword sail by.  He steps in grabbing his assailant's sword 
and delivers an elbow to the warrior's temple.  He is knocked out.

Four other knights draw their weapons. Dolph picks up the unconscious knight by the torso.  
He swings him about using him as a weapon.  Several of the knights are clubbed down.

                           KING MALVALLE
          Stop!  Stop this now!  I command it!
The warriors back off.   Dolph drops the unconscious Knight like a sack of beans.  Augustus 
can be heard retching in a corner.  

Dolph turns to face the king.  The King regains his composure.

                           KING MALVALLE
          If you are an engineer, Sir Dolph, I would 
          hate to see what destruction the warriors of 
          your world are capable of.
          You are a certain choice for this task...  
          Will you help us?
          There is the one thing you haven't said 
          which I know to be the truth.
The entire roomful of people seems to suck in its breath. They fear what Dolph is about to accuse them of.

          And that is?
          If I don't help you, then you won't 
          return me to my home.
Everyone relaxes.  They obviously expected him to say something else.

          An unpleasant thought.  I would rather 
          offer you sugar than poison.
Lucy takes Dolph's hand.  She smiles demurely at Dolph.  Dolph returns a sheepish smile.

          Please, Sir Dolph.
          I'll have to think about it.  
          I need more information.
A look of scorn passes Lucy's face, unnoticed by Dolph.  It is immediately replaced by 
her previous fawning smile.

                           KING MALVALLE
          Very well!  One can not expect you to 
          ride into the unknown unprepared.  Lucy 
          will show you about the kingdom.  This 
          evening we will go over the particulars. 
          You can give us your decision then.

Click here for PART II of "The Beautiful People"